Anxiety . Cleaning . Frasier and Niles
A Room of One’s Own
On April 9, 2022 by Speranza
I have been redecorating my office. Disturbingly, this is something that has not happened for 27 years. I found myself looking at the inside of a door etched with the frantic nail scratching of a sweet dog, long since passed, who was frightened by thunder; paintable ‘Anaglypta‘ wallpaper now stiffly rippling with age, rising up like Japanese Wave Art across one wall; loopy, repulsive carpet when peeled back, reveals an ancient spotty underpad that always reminds me of Pimiento Loaf. (You know the one: a beige deli ‘meat’ with festive coloured bits sprinkled throughout. Spoiler: Those bits will not be maraschinos …)
Beneath the underpad is random, dirty flooring comprised of a variety of planks that likely originated from the garage of some drunken uncles who installed many years before …
There was much for me to do.
Cleaning . The General
Winged Messengers
On October 27, 2016 by Speranza
The last few days I have been noticing that I have a few tiny, tiny holes all in a row on some of my clothes; the pure cotton ones that I really like.
This has not pleased me.
At first, I thought the material might just have caught on a zipper or torn without me realizing, (yes, this is the kind of ridiculous self-talk that can happen when one really, really wants to keep watching The Durrells in Corfu snuggled up with The General, rather than skivvying out a clearly infested closet;) but finally, yesterday when, alas, I noticed that my prized Ann Taylor white shirt had been damaged, (rather like a tiny skater had been in winter training) I knew that I had to do the google search to see which particular plague was now upon me.
Sadly, I have since learned that this is most likely the handiwork of the common clothes-moth (not to be confused with his much uglier, foodie counterpart with whom I am very familiar with (I’m looking at you, bulk-store walnuts!) nor the dreaded carpet beetle fellows (who masquerade as fat grains of rice till the gig is up) that I did battle with a few years ago, after losing several corners of my pure wool area rugs to their gluttony. These tiny villains were eating carpet rows like corn on the cob, the wee bastards, and I had to freeze the rugs outside over the winter to get rid of them …
And, afore ye judge, let it be known that I am a devotee to the Dyson vacuum, and vacuum regularly so all this seems most unfair, puzzling and not a little unsettling.
Cleaning . De-Cluttering & Organizing . Top Ten Lists
Top Ten Reasons Why Organizing isn’t as Satisfying as They Say
On March 28, 2016 by Speranza
10. All those towels rolled as tightly as the folds in our brains may look pristine on the shelf but as a colleague of mine once lamented, how can I get the stripes to line up? (I hope she is now seeking help from someone other than Ralph Lauren.)
9. I worry about our collective obsession with clear plastic containers and bulk-buying. Is there an apocalyptic-style concern about suddenly not being able to access Q-tips?
8. Contradictory messages abound. Flip through any glossy paged cookbook and you will find well-dressed people idly admiring produce at an outside market as a wizened (but also well-dressed) vendor shares a joke. Not many of us can shop like this daily. I myself try to fake it by doing a market run as often as my job allows. The resulting sparkle however is hollow and short-lived; I never carry my baguette in a wicker basket either.
7. My eldest brother who is an Organizer Formidable has an entire drawer in his kitchen calligraphically labelled “Egg” and there resides a snug family of whisks, beaters, timers and coddlers. Although I tease him, I secretly think this is brilliant although I know I am not compulsive enough to have one myself.